Fammer

In the fall, I went to visit friends in Arizona…actually, once I arrived in Arizona it was summer again. However, that’s hardly the point of this. The point is in fact that my friend and I were going into Target when we saw an elderly couple walking to their car.
My friend suddenly exclaimed, “I can’t wait to get old!” I laughed at her because it was such a Sarah-like outburst. She looked at my sideways and defended her statement, “I mean…I can wait, the stuff in the middle will be tons of fun! But it will be good to be old, you know?” I nodded because I did know. I knew exactly what she meant.
“Yeah, it won’t be like regular people getting old,” I said, assuring her I did in fact appreciate what it was she was saying. She nodded eagerly.
“You see couples sometimes,” she started with enthusiasm, “and it’s like they have just run out of things to say.”
“Totally,” was my only reply.
“But we, oh man. We have the Universal House of Justice! And they will keep giving us plans! And we will NEVER even be able to run out of things to talk about!”
“Yeah, and you know how old people seem to get lonely or feel useless? Well, we will always have people over, no matter what, for study circles, for devotions, for travel teachers to stay at our house!” I said, getting caught up in the conversation.
Meanwhile we were passing aisles and aisles of customers who I am sure had no idea what to make of these two teenage girls in their shirts that stated, “Join the Revolution” and “Stand Back! I’m changing the World!” who were also speaking so emphatically.
“Yeah, but we may not even have travel teachers anymore by then.” My friend pointed out.
I nodded and said, “Good call, good call…but people will still travel teach in a different way, don’t you think? To share their stories or artistic talents with other communities, jazz ‘em up and all that.”
“True story,” Sarah agreed.
We both grew silent as I picked out my toothpaste.
“You know what?” I asked her.
“What?” she asked, her head tilted in that oh-so-Sarah way.
“I want to be a travel teacher when I get old, with my husband.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, I want to get an RV, (they will be solar powered by then so I wouldn’t feel bad about wasting gas cuz I wouldn’t be wasting any) and we’d just travel teach. ‘Honey, I made you a tuna sandwich, it’s in the cooler when you get hungry but don’t have it until we are at least through Iowa because you know otherwise…’” And we both laughed at the fake conversation with my future husband which somehow involved a Minnesotan accent.
We were silent again.
“Why’d you pick tuna?” she asked me.
“I dunno…because I don’t like it…so I assume my husband will…you know, opposites attract and all that.”
“Oh, yeah, duh.”
And that was it, that was our conversation in that strange season of fall/summer. Hmm…maybe we should call it fammer…

Blast...it's over

It was starting to feel like the old days.





maybe not quite covered wagon times. but almost.


it was nice to have the family together. and you know what? i am stoked about my future!

next month alone is going to rock faces off. the 21st is when i graduate.

then we take a little jump into a break where my brother will come home, ben and nick brightwell will come and visit and where i will finally go and visit chicago with the girls.

woot woot!

then we can enter the fun world of working full time and worrying about where to serve and where to go to college a little more.

the world feels like a happy place!

A victorious return to Starbucks!...almost...

That's right. I was brave enough to go back to Starbucks after stealing the police man's coffee...possibly because it was a different location, or because i told my friend i would meet him there.

The setup! I enter starbucks a few minutes after 3:00. It's crowded, there is a not a seat anywhere. I approach the counter get my mocha all is well. my friend should come any moment. but he doesn't. about 25 minutes pass, i would call him but 1) feel like i should be more paitient 2) since people were coming over for dinner they kept calling to ask questions.

Finally, he calls me.

"Where are you"
"At starbucks..."
"Me too."
"which one are you at?"
"you told me the one on the plaza..."
"oh. yeah. there are two."

okay, how cliche is that?! we met at the wrong starbucks. I feel like i belong in a Christopher Guest film.

the ride to chipolte

My sister and I are driving to Chipolte and I start ranting about how stupid and weird it is how they have people in their late 20's playing highschoolers. It's bad enough to do that for a movie...but a tv show is even worse I think. So we decided that to solve that problem they should make these shows about COLLEGE! because you can ALWAYS go back to college...no matter what your age, so we (the audience) will believe that these people in their later 20's are in college...because it happens.
Then I started coming up with actors that they could have in these shows. Kirk Douglas. Yes, that was one of my ideas but only because I couldn't remember Robert Redfords name. My sister and I thought this was very funny and decided if these two fellows were in these shows...they would just be talking art classes or yoga. Can you imagine a more exciting tv show????

Starbucks...and other evil things

I like Starbucks. Let me just say that from the start. However, if i have the choice between starbucks and an independently owned coffee house...i pick the latter.

Well, I had a nice little adventure while in Tucson Arizona. Sarah and I were on our way to a good friend's going away party. We knew the party would go late and since my body was in a time zone two hours later...we thought we should get some coffee before heading out. We go to starbucks. Now, I am wearing my "Join the Revolution Shirt" and sarah is wearing her "Stand back! I'm changing the world shirt!" Great combo when out in public, right? Haha.

So the barista asks us what we are fighting for. We both laugh and mention the baha'i faith. Sarah orders. He says he has a friend who is a Baha'i but doesn't know a lot about it. I order. He asks if I will explain it to him. A cop comes up behind me and the other barista says, "The usual?" he nods. Anyway, I start talking about the baha'i faith when a cup of coffee is placed in front of me.

This is where my brain shuts off. So caught up in my conversation...I reach down for the coffee, not even realizing that I ordered an ICED coffee and this was CLEARLY hot. I lifted it to my lips and did the thing I ALWAYS do with hot coffee, i blew in it. As soon as I do I realize my mistake...that this isn't my coffee. That this is the police man's coffee. and i have just blown in it.

great.

All Settled

Alright, Andrew put me back on his list, Sarah is on mine and Caitlin is updated. All is well in blog world.

Yesterday I went shopping at whole foods. This can make one happy, but to make one even happier!!!! i bought falafel, israel's official snack food. Look how yummy! Maybe for tonight we will make this for dinner. My grandfather and his wife are coming into town...i don't know how they would feel about this...






I also bought endangered speices chocolate! no, it is not chocolate made out of endangered species...it is chocolate that provides 10% of its profits to help endangered animals. Sarah,

Afsaneh and I all know and love the products.









This is a pretty boring post, but what do you want from me? I cannot remember how to post. But this is for cait...

I enjoyed the television program last night.

and this is for sarah...

we do all feel bad!! we love you sooooooooooooooooo much!!!!

and this is for everyone else...

Um. Tear!

So I was on my brother's site when I noticed...he totally took me off his list of people. I am hurt. Is it because I haven't updated in several months? Probably, but still this is no excuse. I post this as a protest.


PUT ME BACK ON YOUR LIST BROSKI!!!

A better post will come once I am back on it and safe again.

Heaven on Earth

Rejoice! For I have found it!! The place where all of my money will be going!!!

look familiar? it should. it is a ben and jerry's scoop shop.

this of course is my favy!

but today i had the last straw.

Fundraising

I am a fundraising fool!!! I have started to sell mark...yes, mark...it is an avon line of makeup for youth. As unlikely as that may sound...they are giving me 50% of whatever I sell which means a better chance that my lovely youth will be able to go to new horizons.

I also participated in a car wash.

Soap was also made and sold.

But nothing can compare with what is happening next. This saturday...at my house...there is going to be a....

SPA DAY!

Manicures, pedicures, makeovers, you name it...might...be there!! yeah. hopefully this will make us the hundreds of dollars needed. come...ya know...if you aren't too busy.

I am almost expectant of hearing the doorbell ring and having Ed Mcmahon at my door, with one of those huge checks. He will let me in on the nation's largest practical joke ever...the SAT. Haha, as it turns out, he will tell me, the nation just wanted to freak you out about college with ap tests, sat, and act tests! they don't really mean anything, but if you take so many, you recieve $10,000 for college! Score!

But the bit of realism in me knows that if the doorbell does ring, it will be little Gabrielle down the street wanting to know if fluffy can play and, can she have something to eat?

If you are aware of Dante's Inferno, then you will understand when I say that this past week was lowest level hell week. I had four tests this week, two of them AP, I worked every night, was getting sick, had the SAT yesterday and was attempting to plan a meeting with the youth that fell through. Oh man. I have never felt so successful...oh wait. Yes I have.

Tonight we are having a Cluster Reflection meeting and I am all about it! Bring it on community!!! Show me what you got!!

Kansas Baha'i Spring School

Some Favorite Moments include:

~Gross Gas station food~pigging out~sarah finally arriving~nose cloths~sherry in our room~the stain that wasn't really there~writing by flashlight~getting to know jane better with my girls~eating chocolates~toothpaste~the leopards~getting to know rob~ice tea~creamer~horses~archery~lots of little kids~watching adrienne play duck duck goose~beautiful tears~my hair feeling loved~the skit~knowing that it will be there next year!!!

Interesting Day

It was an eventfully weird day. It all really started this moring with my dream.

See, my sister and I were driving in my car but she was the one driving. We were going to this place that I go to only in my dreams...it's like...a big library/store...okay, I'm not totally sure because I never go inside. But!! Yeah. So I walk my sister to the door and then turn back to find my car. Except since my sister parked the car, I obviously couldn't find it (yeah, i don't see the logic in it either). As I am walking I notice that the back of one of the people walking in front of me looks familiar. Then, I realize that it is Robbie. To make things weirder Chip was walking with him. And!!! As if that wasn't enough Greg's little brother (why am I blanking on his name?!). So, chip recognized me and tried to motion to robbie who was kinda in my way. Robbie looked back and goes,"oh, sorry!" and moves. He totally didn't know it was me. So i was trying not to laugh, and I asked chip if he could help me find my car. Then robbie realized it was me and then he disapeared. Then Sarah came and helped me find my car. I don't think i ever found it.

At school we didn't do much of anything because of the blood drive and I kept feeling badly that I could not give any of mine. Geez, i'm so selfish!

Then, when I got home from school I helped out with garage sale stuff (my Baha'i community is having a garage sale). Pretty soon we had three families over in a very stuffed garage.

THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN. I went to work. For the first hour and a half we barely had any customers so we just told jokes and got in food fights. Oh. And ate. Because we do a lot of that. Oh. And more stuff happened too.

The moral of this story is that...

I need to fill out more scholarship stuff.

Betcha didn't see that one coming!!!!

The Surreal Life

One of the most beautiful feelings in the world to me, is feeling in control and capable of dealing with my tests. The weather is lovely, my summer is shockingly real, my friends are all happy shiney faces!

i like you guys!!

Blazoning as Fire

My favorite moments are as follows

~The drive up, turning our car into a night club, hindi music and all!

~Afsaneh using the seat belt that had to twist all around her body so that she would be safer

~the way the sub goes

~meeting jess, amos, emily, adam

~making up songs

~waking up girls with songs...bwahahahaha!!

~rocking to omnisoul..and fort tabarsi, you ain't never heard this before!

~getting asked the question that would change my life.

~taking pictures of happy shiney luck star souls

~Shayan understanding the amazingness of super special wonderfulness

~our ancestors

~Super Special Wonderfulnes

~Drinking brown water with adam and shayan

~roasting marshmallows over candles

~singing a million and one songs

~talking with hannah

~talking with sarah

~talking with kristin, afsaneh, kelsey, kersten

~MILK!!!

~ teaching sina KC lingo

~i love you all

~i love you all some more

~and a bit more

ps. pictures to come soon!

My Family

A family photo album inspired by Afsaneh.

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A family within a family. Too bad Noah's head is cut off!

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The little kid.

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The party animal!

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The ladies man.

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The singer.

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The fashion conscious.

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the beautiful.

Here ends the album, NOT my family.

Top Ten

Spring break. Hm. Can you even call it spring break if it is not spring yet? I suppose so because we do it.

1.Yeah, so I was surprised Sunday night with Kent's arrival and even though I was freaked out for a good half hour, I had a great visit with him.

2.I really like Kari. Or...Carrie...she is crazy and fun. Totally awesome to be giving me advice on stuff. yeah. way awesome.

3. Noah's concert!! i really am liking his new band. you all should check it out.

4. pink hoodie girl, because she makes me laugh.

5. lovely lovely youth

6. phish food

7. the shins

8. singing

9. movies yet to watched

10. communication. yes. beautiful beautiful communication.

Things that make my psuedo spring break wonderful and great. and a little crazy.

gracefully disappear

Sometimes I wish that if need be,
I could
disappear without upsetting the way things were around me.

I wish that I could extract myself
and if anyone noticed,
it would not be a big enough disturbance to cry out about it, whether postively or negatively.

If I were this way I feel I could run! Fall down!
Skin my knees and NOT care
I would be careful only for my soul's protection







I just want you all to know...you guys are my left liver!!

Okay, so my blog won't let me put all these pictures in one post! But here they are!


who is this? oh yeah, vienna! teng!!

Greg 

Afs! 

Nas! 

Sarah! 

reaching for the pineapple...the picture they thought i wouldn't take!  

Myself, Genevieve, Afsaneh and Anisa, ready to bord the plane for NEBY Fest 2005! 

Ayyam'i'ha

I would like to start of by asking, is it sad that a two year old can whistle and I cannot? I agree.

Ayyam'i'ha has been very grand. Friday night there was a killer party!! Haha. The youth planned a party and a good number of people came.

After devotions and a lot of food the hindi, arabic and persian music was played and people began to dance. I always love to dance at Baha'i things...there is a different vibe there than at other dancing functions. There were games for the little kids which, even though they were in no way fancy, they enjoyed.

Saturday evening I went out to dinner with my brother. It was such a good time! We got Greek food and I confessed to him possibly my greatest fear...the 70's. Yes. The 1970's. I told him how it seems like the 70's was just filled with drugs, serial killers and cults. I think he was trying really hard not to make fun of me.

When I got back home, there were still guests from the devotionals my parents held. I chatted with them for a short while but then I got a phone call from Sara Marie. I really love this girl and miss her terribly. It was very nice to hear her voice and talk with her about Ayyam'i'ha and start to make plans to meet together soon.

I miss Hannah a lot. I am so excited that she is coming to visit from Germany. I feel like she has been away from home far too long. She is coming a day before Nebraksa School, so if she wants to we will go there. Then after that the mural project will be held and of course after that the Ethnic festival will be up in Grand Island. I know it's too early to be thinking of these things...but...I am just excited!

There are so many people that I wish I could see right now!! I just want to give so many of you hugs and then run off. Well..no...I'd like to talk with you also.

I really like the saying you learn something every day...and just in case you haven't learned anything yet...

In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

In Idaho a citizen is forbidden by law to give another citizen a box of candy that weighs more than 50 pounds. (keep this in mind around ayyam'i'ha shopping time)

In New York State, it is still illegal to shoot a rabbit from a moving trolley car.

In Riverside, California, there is an old law on the city's books which makes it illegal to kiss unless both people wipe their lips with rose water.

The Giant cricket of Africa enjoys eating human hair.

Ostriches are often not taken seriously. They can run faster than horses, and the males can roar like lions.

The lifespan of a squirrel is about nine years.

Tuatara lizards, from New Zealand, have two eyes in the center of their heads and a third one on top of their heads.

Giraffes can't cough.

All shrimp are born male, but slowly grow into females as they mature.

NEBY, music and other things of interest

Everyone needs their life shaken up once in a while. Everyone needs their reality to be tested. Everyone needs to cry at beauty.

This past weekend I attended NEBY Fest. I had an amazing time and I think I really am still there. There was a lot of talk about love and the martyrs of our faith. It was moving. I was able to see some of the most amazing people I think I will ever know. There is one man who I have thought for quite some time is special and I always assumed the whole world had to agree. It wasn't until I saw him at the airport getting ready to leave yesterday that I realized no one around him knew how crazy amazing he is.

At the festival I heard great musical artists. I was able to hear and meet Omnisoul, a cool little band that swears they are going to come visit the midwest. Martin Kerr has a wonderful voice and Gen thinks his sound is the future of Baha'i artists. The performance that I was entrirely shaken by was that of Vienna Teng. She seems to have a truly lovely soul. She was very nice and open with us all and it was interesting to watch her performance evolve throughout the night. I can't really believe that I met her. Music soothes and gladdens my heart.

I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm overjoyed we're going to hang out tonight!

"It's so great we're lovers of loving love!"


Last night was really great! About twenty two people were at the house for devotions. It was wonderful to hear a little voice in the middle of prayers saying, "kitty, kitty, kitty!" and seeing all these different people coming together to pray and just be together.

I sat a lot with Earfan and his friend Juan. I tried to speak a little spanish but too bad that I don't speak it very well. Oh well. I try. And having Thaddeus there!!!

I opened the door and he was standing there and I was in shock. I knew he was coming but seeing him there was really amazing still.

A great night. A great night all. And you are all invited to devotions again next saturday though I must warn you that Gen, Anisa, Caitlin, Andrew, Richard and myself will not be there. We will be at NEBY fest. Booyah!

Today

Orange. Orange. And once again orange. People reminded me constantly today that I had orange hair. One girl asked me if I knew that my hair was orange. I assured her I did. She was then asked if she knew her hair was brown.

I realized again how if you are kind to someone how far that kindness can go...the same goes for rudeness and the like. Today when I was worrying about Helen and I slipped up on some orders some people were kind and forgiving, others were not. But this is the life that we live, is it not? Yes. It is. I beat you to the answer!! Ha!!


I hope you all will have marvelous weeks!! I am shooting for the best week ever!!!! yeah, that's right.

I sit and wait

Last night was good. Having to put your trust in someone because there is no other place to put it is a nice feeling in a way.

Gen and I drove down Mastindale Drive, wherever that is. There were many curves in the road and it seemed to be going up hill so it reminded me of last winter in North Carolina.

I want to get everyone in one room, everyone that I love, and just have them all safe in this one room. I want us to be able to stay there all day with no obligations of having to go anywhere except maybe home for dinner. That would be nice I think, because you, whoever is reading this, would be there.

Its a lazy sunday and for those of you who know what that entails for my family, I invite you to have an equally lazy lame sunday evening.

"I have learned that to have a good friend is the purest of all God's gifts, for it is a love that has no exchange of payment." -Frances Farmer

The Scars

If a conversation ever got too heavy, if someone got uncomfortable in a situation, if everyone needed a laugh, I had scars to fix the moment. I had forgotten about these scars until two nights ago but not until today did I check to see how they looked. They weren't there anymore. After over a year of having them on my lower back, my scars are gone. I was doing yoga in my room and while my room is not very nicely sized to be doing yoga, it had been working out for me for a long time. But this day I decided to try a move that I had not yet attempted. Well...not so smart I realized as I fell from the position and scrapped my lower back on my dresser. I just thought it hurt until I looked in the mirror and saw four cuts, they looked like little incisions. After cleaning them up I put on bandaids and then went to school in pain. Haha. What kind of dork gets hurt doing yoga?! I can tell you what kind. A melon dork.

Against All Odds

O SON OF BEING!Busy not thyself with this world, for with fire We test the gold, and with gold We test Our servants.
Baha'u'llah

transform the soul

my heart is not fully back in kansas yet. my mind drifts back and forth between haifa and what is now reality. i miss walking the terraces four times a day, even if my legs did ache a bit. i long to see the Shrine of the Bab again, to hear the silence that surounded it even as it was in the middle of a bustling city.

it was hard to imagine that Baha'u'llah, Abdul'-Baha, and Shoghi Effendi walked in the places we were walking. all of a sudden when you entered these homes They used to live in, you entered that time period. We entered into the cell of Baha'u'llah in Akka and I could not grasp the fact that Baha'u'llah had stayed in that room for 2 and a half years and then here I was...sitting on the same floor. we all knelt in prayer and as soon as we did the Islmaic Call to Prayer began. It was truly amazing, in the real sense of the word.

now to shock you all, i only cried three times. once at the sight of the sunroof Mirzah Mihdi fell through, once at the Beauty of the Bab and Baha'u'llah, once for the love of friend. my mind seemed to be in a constant state of prayer in Haifa. i never got used to everyone in Haifa knowing what the Baha'i Faith was.

Each and every one of you were in my thoughts and prayers while i was away. And i appreciate the ones that got me on and off the plane safely. i wanted to soak up every piece of beauty that i might be able to transfer it to you. i wanted to be able to say just one word and have you understand it all. I never understood the power of Allah'u'abha until i met people from all around the world, people with whom i could not communicate with other than the word of God.

I am back in America. Back in a materialistic country with so much anger, distrust and fights in its interior that is hard to imagine that good can come from it. But i hold out faith. And i pray.

"Shoghi Effendi has, through various channels, been hearing of the wonderful services you are rendering to the Cause. He sincerely trusts that the young and educated Bahá'ís, who have their spiritual faculties fully developed, and who as a consequence appreciate the significance of Bahá'u'lláh's mission in the development of the world, will with one accord, arise and establish the Kingdom of God upon the earth. The world around us is in a pitiable condition and its ills seem daily to increase. It is for us, we Bahá'í youths, who have been entrusted with this divine mission, to do our utmost and rest only when the task has been carried to its successful conclusion."
(Shoghi Effendi, The Light of Divine Guidance)